I loved to read. I was in Year 5 when this happened. I was about 9/10. I had recently gotten into the Harry Potter series and was obsessed with them. At break-time I would sit under a tree or on a bench and read. When break ended, and we had to get into the line to go back to class, I would read whilst walking.
Now, this sounds potentially dangerous, but it's like reading a sign while driving. I could still see that I wasn't going to walk into something, and was being careful. The teachers had no problem with me reading in the line at all. One of my classmates however, Josh, decided to be "responsible".
Josh was a goodie-goodie. He always snitched on people, and had no friends because he always got them into trouble. He preferred having the teachers as friends than kids his age. He was also, incredibly spoilt and overweight. As a 9 year old, being overweight is not good. But it was no surprise considering the stuff he put in his packed lunches.
He either had honey or chocolate spread in his sandwiches, fizzy drinks, chocolate bars, really gross crisps. When he did have fruit, he had a little pot of sugar to dip it in. It was disgusting. He always wore a t-shirt that was so big, it looked like a nightie, and his shorts went way past his knees. He had the appearance of a bag of flour with a face, and a personality to match.
Anyway, I was reading in the line peacefully, and suddenly I hear an entitled little cough, like Umbridge from Harry Potter. He's in front of me in the line ( The line hadn't started moving yet) so I look up and he says snarkily "You shouldn't be reading in the line. You'll crash into someone." I roll my eyes and explain that I won't and that I can see. He starts to speak, but then our line starts moving, so he stops.
However, while we're walking back to class, he kept suddenly stopping in front of me, forcing me to bump into him. And every time he did it, he'd look over his shoulder and smirk. On about the sixth time he swivelled his fat neck around and in the most stuck-up self-entitled voice says "That's what you get for reading in the liiiine. HA. "
I lose it. I swing my book at his smug back with a THWACK and say " THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR BEING AN IDIOT!!! " My friends all started laughing. I would like to mention, it was not at his head, like he later claimed, it was at his back, and that the book was paperback and that I really didn't hit him that hard. Anyway, he immediately said "Ha I'm telling now!" (proving that he was baiting me into hitting him) and walks faster to catch up with the line.
I'm filled with dread, but at the same time, proud that I got him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I walk into the class, is Josh, crying fake tears to the teacher. I sigh, and walk over to face my doom. The teacher, who we'll call Mrs Cool asked Josh what happened, (she was a bit annoyed as Josh crying/snitching was a common occurrence) and here's what he said. I remember it word for word. "Well, I was j-just bending over t-to tie my s-shoelace, when Everdeen c-crashed into me! She yelled at m-me and then hit me with a b-book!" (the stuttering was all clearly faked)
I start to protest when Mrs Cool cuts me of and says to Josh, "Josh, that's all very well...except...You don't have shoelaces." OH MY GOD THAT WAS THE BEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE. The idiot had somehow forgotten he had Velcro shoes! Ha ha ha! I started laughing immediately and Mrs Cool just smiled and looked at Josh like "Try get out of this". He started trying to fix it, saying he meant to say "redo his Velcro" whatever that means.
But it was too late. Mrs Cool just told me to sit down, and told Josh off for lying. The second I got home, I immediately told my little brother and my parents, and the story has now become family legend. I will forever remember the look on his smug little face as he realised...BUSTED.
